HUMOUR IN COURT
witness to Lawyer's crimes
Lawyers should never ask grandmas a question if they aren't prepared
for the answer.
In a trial, a small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness,
an elderly grandmother to the stand.
He approached her and asked; "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?"
She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you
since you were a young boy, and frankly, you're a big disappointment to
me. You lie, cheat on your wife, manipulate people and talk about them
behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the
brains to realize you never will amount to anything more than a two-bit
paper pusher. Yes, I know you."
The lawyer was stunned! Not knowing what else to do,
he pointed across the room and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know the
She again replied, "Why, yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was
a youngster. He's lazy, bigoted, and has a drinking problem. He can't
build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is one of
the worst in the state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with
three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes I know him."
The defense attorney almost died.
The judge asked both lawyers to approach the bench and in a quiet voice
said: "If either of you rascals asks her if she knows me, I'll send you
to the electric chair."
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A similar Court Joke in Tamilnadu:
When an accused could not find any layer to defend his case, the
Judge said, why don't you look for some Ekadasi (means starving
without any case to represent in the Court)Advocate from the lot
waiting out side with Black Coats. The accused accordingly went
out. Sensing the remarks made by the Judge, all the Black Coat
advocates loittering outside said in one voice replied him that
all the Ekadasi advocates are now Judges. Sorry., we can't represent
for you. The accused promptly conveyed this to the Judge.